Adams Adeiza
5 min readMar 31, 2022

The Gift of Gratitude

The most effective tool for building prosperity and guiding against lack (of opportunity) is gratitude.

Many people think they have the habit of showing gratitude but only a few, very few, actually know how to show a proper gratitude.

Gratitude is not for the person that has helped you. It's for you. When shown properly, gratitude can unlock many doors and get you a seat at many amazing tables.

Personally, I have lost count of the many great doors that nothing other than gratitude alone opened for me. If you know me and the many paths I have walked, I want to let you in on the secrets to those exploits: proper gratitude.

At every point in life, even this moment, I have jobs and great opportunities waiting for me. Thank God for an incurable attitude of gratitude.

By the way, gratitude is not a bottom-up-only thing. Great leaders who achieve great results are the best in expressing proper gratitude to their hardworking team members. Now, how do you show proper gratitude?

First, it's not about buying expensive gifts for your benefactor, neither is it about becoming slave to them.

I use this proven 5-day approach to showing gratitude and you should learn about it. By 5-day, I mean there are five specific days on which to express gratitude to your benefactors, and be sure that more favours will come your way.

Gratitude Day 1.
The first day is before the favor is done to you. From my experience, proper gratitude begins way before someone helps you. It's expressed in your attitude towards people generally and particularly towards those who have the power to help you.

Cultivate the habit of treating people nicely, being respectful and showing genuine care.

Several of my ex-students have linked me to gigs and recommended me for opportunities that continue to pay off for me till date simply because of the way I related with them in the past, especially when they were nobody and had nothing to offer me.

More particularly though, there are some people that clearly have the power to help you today, either by virtue of their positions or by way of their network. Identify those people and find ways, one day, to help them first.

Now, I am not recommending that you simply go around kissing and licking the ass of folks in positions. You have to be discerning. Some people in positions are as selfish and as useless as deadwoods. Don't waste your time with those.

In a nutshell, to attract a gratitude-generating favor from people, be a good human being and be worthy of other people's generosity. It's that simple.

Gratitude Day 2.
Someone says, 'there's no action as urgent as showing gratitude to those who have helped you'. I would restate that by saying: gratitude delayed is gratitude wasted.

So, my proven second "day" to show gratitude is within the first hour the favor was done to you. Anything later than that is too late and you run the risk of appearing an ungrateful fellow.

Come to gratitude party late and your benefactor may not appear bothered, but trust me, this is a psychological thing. That tardiness is registered in the subconscious and it would come back to haunt you. So, guys, gratitude party is one party you shouldn't ever go late to. Be there on time, on the hour.

Gratitude Day 3.
Within the first 24 hours after the favor is done to you. Look, most of the world is needy and what you should always remember is that those who have the habit of helping others, and who have gone out of their ways to help you have a thousand other people waiting for the same gesture.

For these benefactors to have looked your way at the point and time they did, they had to look away from a thousand others.

Since research shows that people tend to reflect on their major decisions about 24 hours after, the smart thing to do is to send another message of gratitude to your benefactor within that period to make them feel good about their decision to help you.

If you have to set an alarm to remind you to send that message, do it. Just make sure you don’t let a full day pass without reminding your benefactors that you truly appreciate the favor they did to you a day ago.

Gratitude Day 4.
Within the first week of the generosity. This is beginning to look too much right? Well, here is the thing. You have not shown enough gratitude until it begins to look too much, not to you, but to your benefactor.

Until your benefactor starts to genuinely feel disturbed about your show of gratitude, you probably haven't done enough - keep pushing. On this 4th day, depending on your proximity, I suggest you go beyond a mere text message.

Visit your benefactor, and go with a friend or a family member to thank him or her.

Of course, you mustn't go empty-handed. Get something cool: a wine, a cake, candies, something simple, culturally-appropriate and inexpensive to show your gratitude. It's not the value of the item. It's the thought that matters.

If you are far away, do something creative. Get a friend or family member to call your benefactor and thank him or her for you. Do this and you have unlocked the door to more favors.

Gratitude Day 5
Within the first - what are you expecting? First one month? One quarter? One year? Wrong!

Gratitude day 5 happens to be forever - many other days in the future. These special days reveal how truly grateful you are and how enduring your gratitude is.

This day helps you to cement the relationship with your benefactor and enables you to gain a space in their minds. Get creative.

Gratitude on this day must be random, unexpected, unannounced, and sometimes unplanned on your part. While this could take the form of a short text message reminding them of your gratitude, it should be more about your attitude and behavior towards them.

I am not saying that you should turn yourself into a slave for your benefactor, neither am I saying you should go and commit a crime for them in the name of gratitude.

But I am saying, your benefactor must have a sense that your are, indeed, a grateful lot.

By and large, it's no-brainer: gratitude begets more favors. But the problem is, not many people know how to show proper gratitude.

If God (Al-Rahman), the most beneficent, loves most those who thank Him best, what would you expect of humans? Gratitude well-delivered is the best life-changing tool ever invented. Show it even before you need to, show it quickly and consistently, and you are on your way to a life of abundance.